Holiday Blues: What to do when you don’t want to party?

I am beyond excited for the start of this Holiday season. I have always been a lover of family gathering and all things Christmas. But this year I was met with the reality that everyone around me may not be feeling the same way about the holidays. An extremely close friend of mine lost her mother last year very close to the holidays. Me being vested as much as I am to my friends and family I could not over look that this holiday will bring her some feelings outside of warm and mushy. She will have to deal with feelings like anxiety and sadness. But I am watching my friend overcome the holiday blues in a way that I had to share with my party going crew (that’s you).

It’s hard enough dealing with holiday parties without any emotional trauma and grieving.  Black twitter took to the internet with a whirl wind of clap backs for all your invasive cousins, aunts and uncles. I mean it is hilarious check out this buzz feed article to see a few Holiday Clap Backs   

Funny as those clap backs are; the truth is all of your well meaning questions can add anxiety to your holiday gatherings so be careful what you are asking friends and family in the mist of small talk. Be sensitive to family members that may have lost love ones. Think about what you may be asking and if this topic is a sensitive one. In other words don’t kill the vibe. Here are three things I have noticed my friend doing that is helping her cope with the lost of her mother for the holidays.

  1. Starting New Traditions- The holiday is a great time to start something new with friends and family to help you take your mind away from your grief. May be planning an upscale “Friendsgiving” dinner before your official Thanksgiving festivities. Even though isolation seems like what you want it can be a catalyst for increased depression.
  2. Change of atmosphere- Taking a trip from the usual holiday environment you may have shared with the love one you lost. We are going out of town for the holidays, a little girls trip. The excitement of the trip and a new space seems to be helping my girl friend a great deal.
  3. Change your small talk group- If  you step out to a party with family and friends trust your conscious. If you don’t like the way a conversation is going politely remove yourself from the conversation and find a group that you are more comfortable with. You can also just clap back (just kidding not the best option).

Healthline has an awesome article with some great research on holiday depression please take the time out to check it out:Holiday Depression

I love to party and passionately plan holiday gathering but my love for weddings, holiday gathering and social gatherings in general stem from my love for people. Holiday parties can be an emotional event for some. When you turn up this holiday season be tasteful. Like always happy planning from the passionate planner.

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Photo by Salah Alawadhi on

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